Jedi's Spirit Vol 1 The Bounty is On
by The0ctagon
Summary: Hi im a noob at this so comment my story, its a new story with a star wars theme its basicly as seires i like to start called Jedi's Spirit each story contains another jedi's tale so read on this fist one is about Counis Conder and his hunting of a bounty
1. Intro

1CHAPTER 1

There once was a man named Counis Conder. Counis really loves his big penis. He was also a "Jedi Master" currently visiting the planet Tatooien. He is accompanied by his apprentice young "Damious Miles." Damious also loves Counis' big penis he likes the hair rubbing against his face it tickles his mustache. Anyway they where on a long and rigorous adventure which was appointed to them by Master "Obino Sheshjes." Obino has a small penis and he cant even please an immature camel. So as I was saying despite the fact that Young Damious was only the age at the age of 15 they where ready for a task as tough as this one. They where told to find the famous bounty hunter named "Jenson Wildy." Wildy is married to Michael Jackson they have 85 kids how this is possible I don't fucking know. Besides the fac that Master Obino has a small penis he told them Wildy could be found on the planet "Tatooien." Master Conder was beginning to wonder if he was even on this planet for this is there 3rd day on "Tatooien" but still not a trace of Jenson. This task was starting to become harder then Master Conder thought it would be.

"Master Conder Help!" Cried young Damious.

"Hold on im coming!" Replied Master Conder.

Counis peered his head around the corner so he could locate Damious. He quickly drew his light saber and dashed towards Damious. Damious was screaming for help it appears a local shop keeper called the driod authority in the town.

"Master help!" Screamed Damious as he fended off the battle driods.

Counis quickly jumped into the action he skimmed across the field and counted 35 driods it seems that Damious had slain two in the short period Counis was gone he was impressed. Counis quickly slashed 3 heads off the metal clacked against the ground and through up quite a lot of dust. The dust shot up and the driods where blinded for a short moment Damious took this pause to his advantage and quickly dashed through out of the battle field to call for help. Counis saw his escape and kept on fighting. Counis jumped up and landed on another driod smashing him to the ground and breaking the arms and legs of the driod.

"BLAST BLAST BLAST." A loud blasting sound came from the corner.

Counis recognized the screaming and quickly went off. Deflecting blast after blast running as fast as he can to save Damious. He approached the corner and found the dead body of Damious. Smack! Bang! Pow! Counis fell to the ground the last he remembered was the dead body of young Damious Miles. He wished he could of came faster. He should of been there it was now on him to avenge the death of young apprentice Damious Miles. The last thing he let out before his body hit the ground and the cool metal of the driods hand where lifting him to the space ship was. "You'll pay for Damious's death I sware on you will pay!..."

Said Counis before his body sadly struck the ground.

END OF CHAPTER ONE

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	2. The Meeting

1CHAPTER 2

Counis awoke several hours later his head was in a daze and all he could remember was the death of young Damious Miles. Counis reached for his light saber and saw it was gone he peered across the room and saw the light switch was off. He rose to his feet and turned it on he looked around the room now that it was light he could see. He turned his head tot he right and saw a window he approached the window slowly as not to awake anyone out side. He peered out the window and saw he was in a vast desert town. He noticed the location 300 meters from where he landed the ship he was in luck. I looked to the other side of the room and he saw the door. He thought for a moment and then before he knew it a driod entered the room.

"Jedi come with me." Said the driod.

Counis did not answer the machines request but did as he was told. The driod took him out of the small room and he went down stairs. As he went down stairs he approached a man in a chair he quickly realized who it was as soon as he saw his face.

"Holy shit!" screamed Counis.

Counis quickly knocked the driods hand to the side and smashed its head onto the table in front of him. He twisted back the driod's and shot the driod in the head with the driod's rifle. Counis grabbing the driods blaster rifle out of his hand began shooting blasts at the man who he knew was his father. "Sith Master Conder." As soon as counis could he started taking shots at the shadowy figure that was his father aimlessly shooting at corners of the cloak but missing as if they where going through his body. He glimpsed the red blade shoot from the figure. He quickly dashed out of sight as fast as he can running to the top floor. With all of Master Counis Conders might he jumped out the window.

"Ahhhhhh!" screamed Counis as he jumped from the hut.

His feet touched soil as he hit the ground he tunred his head and saw the driod army chasing him getting closer and closer and closer and closer!...

END OF CHAPTER 2

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	3. Shit Tuskin Raiders

1CHAPTER 3

"Oh my god!" Said Counis as the figure approached.

He was running at top speed trying to escape. He dashed into a mechanics store and saw a speeder he went for it.

"Hey that's my ride way are you doing!" Yelled the angry mechanic.

Before Counis cold think he shot three blasts at the mechanic two missing and one piercing his leg the mechanic fell to the ground pleading for help.

"Help me help me this bastard shot my leg help!" Screamed the mechanic in pain.

Counis silenced his cries by firing the final shot and then sped off on the speeder it appears he had lot his father. Counis needed to get off this planet and fast.

"Blast!" A loud blasting sound came from behind him.

"Shit Tuskin Raiders!" Said Counis as he pulled into the jagged rock formation. He could here blast behind him he was dodging from right to left trying to avoid the red rays of energy. He was almost at the end of the formation if he could reach the end before there blasts touched him he would be able to leave the town and be free from the Raiders.

"Boom!" Counis was to late they pierced his engine and he began to slide towards the wall.

Counis wasn't going down this easily he jumped off the speeder right before it smashed against the wall. Counis started running by foot he could hear the enemy speeders approaching. Lucky for him his crash caused and avalanche it was a site he had never witnessed before. The rock came tumbling down so fiercely and powerfully upon the Raiders he could see the blood and gore coming out of there filthy bodies. This feeling made Counis satisfied but he began to think towards the dark side. Counis felt an huge amount of weight on his shoulders. He felt as if he was carrying the galaxy upon his shoulders. He was ready for anything ahead. Counis quickly dashed out of the jagged formation. He was free from his father. But he needed help he had to get back to the Jedi temple. Before it was to late...

END OF CHAPTER 3

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	4. Isn't Kodak a Film Company

1CHAPTER 4

Counis is speeding along the empty barren wasteland of "Tatooein" when he hears a cry for help! He stops the speeder, jumps out, and starts running towards the pained voice. He approaches a bloody figure with no limbs.

"OMFG ITS DAMIOUS MILES MY FUCKING APPRENTICE HOLY SHIT YOU'RE MY APPRENTICE I THOUGHT U WHERE FUCKED OVER!" Shouted Counis Conder while doing so attracted 18 large kodak bears.

The bears pulled out assorted weaponry. 3 of the bear pulled out switchblades, and another two pulled out UZI's and the rest of the bear ripped their testicles off and tied them together with a string. Counis stared at the bears private part which was missing to large hairy testicles it was extremely bloody blood was dripping down from the penis as if it was having its period. Counis had read some where that periods attract bears it meant they would have reinforcements. Suddenly, a pair of bears started swing with testicular nun-chucks above their heads and yelping disturbing words. For some unknown reason, a bunch of tusken raiders came around the bears.

"This must be some sort of herding technique practiced by bears!" though Counis. He was thinking about making him self and egg salad sandwich it was really bugging him and getting into his mind. Counis quickly forgot about the egg salad sandwich when the bear accidently shoved one or the testicles into another bears eye causing the bear to fall over. Which knocked over another bear and some how knocked all the other bears over like dominos. Counis was surprised amused and mind baffled at the blunder and relatedness of what just happened. He looked around the desert in aw and then just slowly walked back to his speeder. In his head he was playing the matrix theme song. So for him it would seem like he actually achieved something in the strange and perverted in counter with the kodak bears.


End file.
